Buy a bidet, you filthy savages.

Too many people start their day by smearing shit on themselves instead of spending $20 on a bidet.

Got poo on you? Bidet.

A little constipated? Enema via bidet.

In the mood for a naughty tickle? Bidet.

Homemade water fountain? Bidet.

Need to blast the literal asshole off an enemy? Full power on the bidet.

I can’t think of any problem in this world that can’t be solved with a bidet. Buy one, you filthy savages.

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