Strange Days The Fecal Matter

Hey chikapoo mane, Can I use your phone for a second? I left mine at da House!

*No problem. Here you go*

Thank you man- Oh… you got something brown on your screen mane.
A little smudge.

Oh, that? Just ignore it. It’s just a little ***fecal matter***

Ok mane I’ll just rub it o- uh- HEY MANE! Fecal matter is SHIT!

Oh no mane, it’s just a small minute deposit of fecal.
***Use the phone.***

Uh.. no I’m NOT gonna use it. I’m gonna hand it back to yo nasty ass.

Don’t worry mane, EVERYONE uses the phone on the toilet, and a small amount of fecal matter gets on the phone. Even when they don’t wash their hands, or when they flush the toilet. *Use the phone.*

Why do you get like this every blue moon mane?
You just have STRANGE DAYS!

Don’t you use the phone when you’re on the toilet, mane?

Yeah, but I’m a bear mane. And when we take the shit we SCRRRUNCH our asshole tight, so we don’t have to wipe or wash. But you humans have to, mane. Uh, I changed my mind you can have the phone back I’ll just go home and use my own phone.

Mane if you don’t use this phone right now ***I’ll kill you.*** You’re gonna put the phone close to your cheek, rub it in, *let the fecal matter set in*, and use the phone.

What’s wrong with you mane? I’m not using this phone mane, it’s NASTY!

Millions of people use other people’s phones without a care in the world, a care about a dirty screen or a care about fecal matter. You’re gonna be like those people. **You’re gonna use the phone.**

Aw naw mane.. You’re gonna kill me over using a dirty phone?

It’s just a small amount of intestinal fecal matter..
(Aw naw mane.. I don’t wanna use the phone!)
Use the phone
I promise when I shit im gonna SCRRUUUUNCH it up and wipe. And wipe my balls too!
(It’s just fecal.)
Use the phone.
(Naw… don’t make me use-)
Use the phone mane.
It’s just fecal matter. Use the phone. Everyone else does it. Use the phone.

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