Vice City

What the ever-loving fuck did you just say about Vice City, bitch? I’ll have you know that I’ve spent roughly 800 hours playing Vice City, completing each and every mission on my own with no cheats involved… EVER. I know each and every neighborhood, street, hell even the fucking road of Vice City, you hear that you punk son of a bitch? If you ever talk shit about Vice City I will beat the living shit out of you. You know how in Vice City, you can beat the shit out of civilians with your fists and legs while playing as Tommy Vercetti? Well, I’ll let you know that I can replicate all of his moves in real life. And just like Vercetti, I get all the bitches on my dick. Women tell me left and right that I’m so hot they want to fuck me, and I’m like “nawww bitch.” My wife ALSO plays Vice City, and we’re raising our child in a very 80s environment to compensate for Vice City’s theme. As a matter of a fact, I’m writing this while wearing the same shirt Tommy wears as his flagship. I’m just laughing thinking about how much of a fucking pussy you are in real life, bucko. Got no meaning in life without playing Vice City or not liking it. I bet you’re one of those wimps who play San Andreas. Bitch, if you want a REAL challenge for men, and if you want bitches on your dick, go and play VICE CITY RIGHT NOW!!!

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